When we travel by car, my wife is always hyper-focused on where she can find the next bathroom – and with good reason! Please click on the title.
Author: michael crawley
HERE KITTY KITTY!
Our cat got an infection that required us to use an applicator to dispense the medicine directly onto the kitty’s backside – after we had shaved her! Please click on the title.
A BAD MOOD!
My wife woke up in a BAD MOOD, and, as usual, she blamed me. Unfortunately, as the morning progressed, she only got crankier! Please click on the title.
A MOUSE IN THE HOUSE!
We recently had a mouse in our home, and the critter managed to run up my wife’s pajama pant leg! Please click on the title.
I DESERVE A REWARD!
I deserve a reward for enduring the mind-numbing drudgery of performing menial household tasks! Please click on the title.
ARE YOU SURPRISED?
While my wife was out of the house, I decided to make her a birthday cake from scratch. What could possibly go wrong? Please click on the title.
CLOTHES MAKE THE MAN!
For some reason, my wife is always nagging me to update my wardrobe. I have no idea why, and, in any case, I believe it's a lost cause! Please click on the title.
WE HAVE A WINNER!
Here is a marital dilemma. As a husband, if I accidentally find money, do I have a responsibility to tell my wife? Please click on the title.
I CAN FIX IT!
My skeptical spouse never hesitates to point out that, when it comes to home repairs, I have a knack for making any bad situation WORSE! Please click the title.
NEW KITCHEN CURTAINS!
While attempting to prepare a lovely romantic dinner for my wife, I inadvertently set fire to the new kitchen curtains. Let’s just say that utter chaos ensued! Please click on the title.
I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!
Although my wife’s closet is bursting with clothing of every description, each time we get ready to go out, she claims she has nothing to wear! Please click on the title.
HIDE THE EVIDENCE!
In our marriage, I’ve found that it’s best to hide the evidence rather than admit when I’m wrong! Please click on the title.
DRAWN TO A FLAME!
My wife is obsessed with the way our home smells. Unfortunately, she believes this is a constant battle she must wage at any expense. Please click on the title.
WHAT A BARGAIN!
There is an extensive list of shopping horrors that husbands endure. However, nothing delivers as much misery per square foot as an antique store! Please click on the title.
HAPPY CAMPERS!
Camping is the unwelcome intrusion of fragile human beings into the unforgiving domain of animals and insects who are far more suited to the land and water than we will ever be! Please click on the title.
NO HELP AT ALL!
There is nothing better than a good home-cooked meal, as long as I’m not the one who has to cook it! Please click on the title.
THE SILENT TREATMENT!
When we have an argument, my wife does not fight fair. Consequently, I never win! Please click on the title.
A DIGESTIVE DISASTER!
If you have ever been trapped in a situation where you desperately needed a bathroom, you will enjoy reading about my misery and my wife’s complete lack of empathy! Please click on the title.
A CAT CATASTROPHE!
The cat and I have a long history together, and it is NOT pretty. We have no use for each other, yet we manage to co-exist – but just barely! Please click on the title.
IS IT HOT IN HERE?
As the sun’s luminous rays peek over the darkened horizon, a glorious new morning slowly dawns, unleashing the never-ending battle for control of the thermostat that begins anew each day in our humble home. Please click on the title.
MEALTIME MISERY!
It is my firm belief that when it comes to marginally mediocre meals, LEFTOVERS are LEFTOVER for good reason! Please click on the title.
IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH!
It is a heartbreaking fact that the most dreaded health crisis endured by married couples is THE MAN COLD! Please click on the title.
TESTOSTERONE VS. ESTROGEN!
Marriage is a husband trying to watch sports on TV while suffocating in the overwhelming stench of potpourri! Please click on the title.
LOST AND FOUND!
Here is an entertaining story about how I do not possess a sense of direction, and ultimately, that forced me to share a ride with an unusual traveling companion! Please click on the title.
PICK A COLOR!
My wife forced me to accompany her to look at hundreds of paint samples. Talk about exciting! Please click on the title.
KING OF THE KITCHEN!
Some husbands excel in the kitchen, while some of us don’t. After several fiery mishaps, my wife banned me from that particular room in our house! Please click on the title.
WELCOME
Hello! I’m Michael, and I want to welcome you to my blog. Marital Madness is a place where you can escape from the problems of daily life by reading the hilarious ramblings of a clueless husband. My wife and I have been married for decades, and I think you will find our uproarious adventures both … Continue reading WELCOME
TRAVEL TROUBLE!
Traveling is the ultimate test of a marriage. What should be a carefree jaunt that offers a relaxing diversion to everyday life often turns out to be a test of wills between a husband and wife! Please click on the title.
THE SECRET MARRIAGE CODE!
My wife never really says what she means. Instead, she prefers to talk in her secret marriage code that, by some miracle, I’m supposed to understand! Please click on the title.
WARM AND FLUFFY!
I honestly did not know the cat was in the dryer when I turned it on. That simple mistake could have cost the feline its life. It almost cost ME mine! Please click on the title.
DIETING DESPAIR!
DIET is the most despised four-letter word in the English language. Yes, there are others with the same number of vowels and consonants that shock and offend, but none compare to the misery that this word causes! Please click on the title.
HUSBANDS KILL THE SPIDERS!
It is a well-established fact that the husband is responsible for killing all spiders in the home. Some are just better at it than others! Please click on the title.
ZIP IT!
Here is a funny story about a humbling personal experience that I am willing to share for your amusement! (You’re welcome.) Please click on the title.
DON’T WORRY, OLD AGE IS TEMPORARY!
Age is a comprehensive attack on the human body. It never retreats, and there is no defense. So, we might as well laugh at our problems as we enter those golden years! Please click on the title.